Love Letter to My Husband

(Then 1998 & Now 2010)

Michael,

It all started with a simple question, “What happened?” I am so very thankful that you hurt your knee 12 years ago. I realize you might have wanted to avoid tearing your muscle and you might have wanted to skip out of knee surgery, but seeing you hobble around on your crutches at bowling gave me the courage to approach my crush and ask “What happened?”

During the many years we were dating, I was anxious to marry you. I remember very clearly around year 7 when I would get upset after every time we went out because I was certain each time the proposal was coming. I remember my friends saying I should give you an ultimatum; I considered it. But would I really want to force you? Would I really leave you because you didn’t propose? Nope. Because even back then, I knew what a catch I had on my hands. I couldn’t willingly give up the one person that gives me comfort on a daily basis, that makes me feel beautiful and loves me for me. I realized that the ring wasn’t as important as you. (For those who might be curious he proposed just shy of our 9 year anniversary.)

Two years ago we got married and that day is the second happiest moment of my life. (First is welcoming Desmond to this world with you.) This past year has really showed me how much you love me. Being a new mom isn’t easy and I know I haven’t been the easiest person to be around now that my stress level and anxiety is triggered with just the smallest agitation. You are the ice that cools my fire.

I can’t imagine finding another man that will willingly dance with me at every wedding, looking like we are suffering from seizures. A man who attempts lyrical dancing during the opening song of Battlestar Galactica, a man who would still love and kiss me if I had no lips, a man who trims my snaggle toes, a man who makes all phone calls because I won’t and a man who makes me feel safe and gives me and Desmond all the loving we need and more.

And I just want to say that after 12 years I’m still madly in lesbians with you.

You’re the peach to my cream,

Mrs. Michelle Pack

A Word to the Unwise

This weekend I was a little stressed out. My son is turning one and on Friday morning I find out the photographers scheduled his photo shoot for Saturday morning when I had a confirmation they were a month later. Though it doesn’t seem like a big deal, I had big plans for nice outfits for me, my husband and child. So I took a half day off work to find said items in one night of shopping. I was really proud of myself and how much I got done before Saturday mornings photo shoot.

As I got ready Saturday, I’m wearing my new outfit. I’ve put on my new make-up and I’m feeling great about how I’m looking. So as my husband is driving us to our appointment I notice he keeps looking at me. I think it’s because of my make-up; it’s a little different than what I normally wear but it’s a subtle change. I begin to doubt my new confidence I have from the outfit and make-up. So I’m looking for a quick pick me up. I ask…”How do I look honey?”

Granted, what my husband responded with wasn’t bad, but a word to the unwise…when your wife asks “How do I look honey” please don’t say “Fine.” Fine feels like it’s just above acceptable. Fine feels like “it’ll do.” Fine feels indifferent. If a woman is asking how she looks she is NEVER waiting to hear the word “fine.” I can guarantee it. Now if that woman is insecure about her weight, on her way to a photo shoot capturing said weight and you’re driving in the car to that appointment so there’s no chance of changing what she’s wearing, it very safe to say “fine” is not going to work. And it’s also safe to assume she’s going to be a little snappy.

I know, I know…I’m being a little sensitive and crazy. I’ll be the first to admit it but if this small warning can help any couple from having a stressful car conversation on what “fine” does and does not imply, then I have succeeded. So gentlemen, never say your lady friend looks fine, it just doesn’t cut it. Imagine how different this would have felt if he had said “Great.” That one little word changes the tone completely. Makes for a happy wife and pleasant car ride.

Good luck Gentlemen…us woman are complex creatures.