2011 - The Year for Doing

Family Photo 2010

Wow, another year is over. I feel like I’m leaving 2010 a brand new woman. I started the year at 239 pounds and leaving it at 209. Good riddance to those 30 pounds! I also, started the year as a nightly couch potato and now I’m happily occupied with derby. I’d really like to keep the momentum going with the positive changes in my life so here is a new list of goals for me to work on in 2011.

#1 Weight – Of course, there’s weight. Who can really leave off that one on their list? My goal is to lose another 30 pounds in 2011. This should be pretty easy. First off, my previous 30 pounds were really lost in the second half of 2010, so this goal should be more than obtainable. Plus, I’ve blogged previously that when I reach 180 pounds I can get my Desmond tattoo…well losing 30 pounds would get me there and I really want that tattoo!

#2 Food – It’s no secret I HATE to cook. But this goal really benefits me and my family. I am committing to cooking two meals a week. Now two meals a week might not sound like a lot but for me, it is. I average one meal a week if I remember to purchase stuff to make spaghetti. My kid eats way too much processed food. And if I eat correct proportions (and I will, I’m watching that waistline) I should have enough leftovers to carry over for me and Des for a few days. And for those of you that read my blog and love to cook, send me your easy to make recipes. Or if you know of a cookbook that has lots of kid friendly meals, give me the name of it. I’m not afraid to ask for help. I would also be interested in a cooking party that you prepare meals for the week and freeze them. I literally just need someone to show me the way.

#3 Blog – Blogging makes me happy. But sometimes I get lazy and don’t feel like doing it. On those lazy days that I make myself write, I always thank myself for pushing. So my goal is to write once a week or have 52 total at the end of the year. That’s guaranteeing me that I’ll feel a sense of accomplishment each week.

#4 Dance Central –I want to beat Dance Central before the end of the year. Now, I want to say I’ll beat it on hard but I have never in my entire life beat a game that wasn’t on easy. SO, I’ll go as far as saying I’ll beat the entire game on medium before the end of the year.

#5 Running – Last year I took a zero to 5k class. I never reached the point that I could run the entire 5k but I definitely saw an improvement. I want to complete at least one 5K. AND on top of that…I want to get in enough shape to compete in the Muddy Buddy Race. The Muddy Buddy Race is a running/biking race with obstacle courses that end in a mud crawl. I almost signed up this past year with my friend Dayna but I just didn’t feel ready to compete in it. Not only will training for these races help my weight loss but it’ll help me build endurance that will benefit roller derby. It’s a win-win situation.

#6 Finances – We started 2010 with seven credit cards. Yes, seven! We like many Americans have our fair share of debt and have wanted to work out a plan to pay them off. Well, we got as far as one card.

So as we enter 2011 with six credit cards to pay off, my goal is to pay off at least two more cards. That’s one more than this year and that much closer to being out of debt.

So that’s what I’m starting with in 2011. If I think of more, then I guess I’ll just have to blog about it later. I’m always heard that if you write your goals down then you are more likely to accomplish them. Take a moment and write a few things down for yourself. You never know what can happen. I blogged in July that I wanted to check out derby and by August I did and now I’m still doing it. I might have never taken the initiative had I not written it down. Happy New Year’s everyone!!!

Book Review: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

Why oh why did I wait this long to read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Steig Larsson??? I’ve been in some sort of reading funk lately. I’ve picked up perfectly good books and within the first few chapters I put it down permanently. It’s like my love of reading had vanished for a few months. Well, it’s been revived. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo was one of those books for me that I just couldn’t put down. It reminds me of how The Time Traveler's Wife made me feel. I wanted to read it at red lights, before bed and at lunch. I swallowed the whole book in two days. And the best part about this book…was that every recommendation I received and even the back of the book didn’t even come close to describing what is in this book. As I write this blog, I can’t even clearly sum up all parts of this wonderful piece of literature.

Ok, in very, very short form, it’s a mystery. But it’s so much more than that. The two main characters don’t even meet until well into the second half of the book. This gives Steig Larsson the time to really build the characters personal storylines. It also gives him time to lay the foundation of the mystery. The book doesn’t feel rushed and there’s a natural build up to the conclusion, which if it isn’t a bit shocking to you, then I think you’re lying. It’s one thing if you suspect them as a murderer but if you suspect them for their actual crimes, you should get your head examined because you’re sick.

Now, my favorite part of the story…Lisbeth. She’s only half of the main characters but for me, she’s the better half; the more interesting half. The story can’t be told without Mikael and it’s not like I don’t like him; He’s pretty average. Therefore he gets average attention from me. I liked reading his parts of the book because you learn about the mystery and follow the way to solving it through mostly him but Lisbeth definitely had character strength in spades. Not only does Lisbeth help solve the mystery but you’re completely entwined and sucked into her personal life. You like reading about the slivers of information given on her past that have molded into who she is today. You like reading the crazy shit that goes through her head and you want to know where her character is going, which is excellent for Steigh Larrson because it means people will read sequels. (Which there are two and I’m dying to read them!!!) She’s just full of surprises. One minute your feeling sick to your stomach of the things done to her and then the next minute you’re cheering her on for being a complete badass. She is completely socially awkward and 100% lovable. I encourage you to read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I give it two thumbs way up!

I Got me a Soldier

On Facebook I’m always seeing “Repost this comment if you support our troops.” But how does this really support our troops? Is someone showing soldiers these comments? Is it just something a soldier will see in passing if he’s lucky enough to be able to login to Facebook overseas? Is it really that heart felt when it’s just a simple copy and paste? I don’t know. And for a long while I never did more than see them myself on facebook.

Well, yesterday I did something that is making me nervous. I adopted a soldier. Why would this make me nervous? Well, I committed to writing him a letter once a week. I’ve committed to sending him a care package each month. It won’t cost me much and that’s not really an issue. For me, I’ve always been shy when first meeting someone. Granted I won’t ever get to meet my soldier, but I’ll be writing and starting dialogue with a complete stranger. In fact, I’m not guaranteed he’ll even write back so I might just be having a one sided conversation. That terrifies me. What if he finds my letters unentertaining and boring? What if my care packages suck? But I’m just going to grab the bull’s balls and do it anyways because if it does bring cheer, then I’m happy to provide that.

Now, you might be thinking…what promoted this adoption? It wasn’t Facebook. Believe it or not it was fanfiction. I’m currently reading a story about a military family and authors will commonly add footnotes at the end of their chapters. The author mentioned being a soldier’s angel and listed the website where one could look and find out how to help the cause; I looked and I wanted to be a part of it. (Check out www.soldiersangels.org) I can’t help but think this is what should be posted on facebook. I didn’t even think about adopting a soldier until I read it somewhere. Posting “Support our troops by adopting a soldier at soldiersangels.org” is so more proactive than “Repost this comment if you support our troops.” So thank you LadyExcalibur2010! You’re not only helping your adoptees but you helped another soldier get an angel by putting the word out there.

This might be something your interested in doing but don’t feel like you can commit to the time it takes to send a letter each week and a care package each month. And that’s ok. If you wanted, you could help me support my troop. His estimated date to return home is October 2011. So I have 11 months of showing my support. If at any time between now and then you’d like to donate to my troop, just send me an email or give me a ring and I’ll run over and pick it up. It could be a letter, a card, or items for his care package. I have included a list below of items commonly sent to our troops. Also, it doesn’t cost a thing to sign up. I did however opt to donate $1 so I could automatically verify my identity and get a soldiers name right away.

Today I’m sending my first letter to Michael (that’s his name) and I’m going to put together a care package this weekend in hopes he will receive it by Christmas. I hope he finds the time to reply and I hope he doesn’t find me too annoying. I’m excited to be doing this for him and I hope I might just pay it forward by inspiring someone else to adopt a soldier or by getting help from friends and family to support mine.

For more information check out: http://www.soldiersangels.org/

The following are used in care packages. Please note that items must be new and unopened:

Food
Powdered Drink Mixes (individual packets are best), Cookies, crackers, pretzels (in snack sizes), tuna in a pouch, Beef/chicken/or turkey jerky, Cheese spread (no aerosol cans!), Ramen noodles, Snack cakes, Gum, Nuts, Granola bars, Pop Tarts, Dried fruit, Trail mix, Pistachios, raisins, Red licorice twists, Tootsie Rolls (both candy and lollipops), Peanut butter Triscuits, wheat Thins, Canned meats (no pork products), Hard candy (individually-wrapped)

Sports Equipment
Baseballs, Baseball gloves, Soccer balls, Basketballs, Volleyballs, Squirt guns, Frisbees

Entertainment
AA & AAA batteries, Books (mysteries, action, drama, science fiction), Magazines – new or nearly new (sports, news, entertainment, travel, nature), Playing cards, Small hand-held games, Crossword puzzles, CD's\DVD's

Hygiene Supplies
Facial cleansing pads, Moisturizing lotion, Wet Wipes, Eye drops, Lip balm, Toothpaste, toothbrushes, Soap, Body wash, Shampoo and conditioner, Deodorant, Sunblock, Foot powder

Miscellaneous
Blank cards, Stationary, paper, Pens, Letters, Ziploc bags (sandwich, qt., gal. sizes)

• Please keep in mind that all food items must be in the manufacturer’s original packaging.
• NO chocolate - 110 degree heat and chocolate do not mix well, though M&M’s are fine.

Jolly to be Happy

Did you ever just stop what you’re doing and think “I’m happy”? …I did. This past Sunday I was out shopping with the husband and child and as we were leaving the store I became very aware of the smile on my face. I could feel the joy in my heart. I felt loved. I felt good. And I looked to my husband and said “I’m happy.” And then I felt happy that I was happy. It felt like I’d never spoken those words aloud before. How often do we acknowledge the ones we love that we are happy with our lives? That we are happy they are our spouses? (Honey you getting the message here, you’re a catch!) It just felt like a shocking revolution because I don’t physically say out loud enough how happy things make me. And when I do say things make me happy I also tend to throw in buts…I love this restaurant but…I had a great night but…you get my drift. So to keep the positive flow going, here is a whole list of things that make me happy….and no buts about it.

I’m happy with my family life. Heck, I should really say overjoyed with my family life. I have the CUTEST son ever, who is ever amazing me. I have a husband that works hard for the money and keeps love and laughs in our marriage. I’m happy about my job. I love my co-workers and I’m glad that I don’t wake up everyday and have to dread coming to work. I’m happy to have discovered derby. It gives me something to strive for and is changing my body is so many amazing ways. I’m happy with my friends. They rock! I’m happy with my family. Every minute I get to spend with them is treasured. I’m happy I found a good at home day care. I’m happy I can pay my bills. I’m happy to have a car that works. I’m happy to still have cable. I am happy.

You try writing your happy list. It just makes you realize how much you have to be happy about.

Ok, don’t cheat…how many times is the word happy repeated above? If you guessed thirty three you’d be wrong, it’s only twenty one!

And now a quick update on my weight loss. I wrote a blog about 7 weeks ago hoping to lose 18 lbs before my high school reunion. It didn’t happen BUT I’m happy to say I did lose 9.2 lbs in six weeks! So now it’s time to set another goal. I’ve found that since Thanksgiving I’m having a hard time watching what I’m eating, so a weekly check in to keep me accountable needs to stay in place. In approximately 7 weeks is my 29th birthday. My new goal is to be under 200 lbs by January 19th!

All I Want for Christmas...is an Elephant?

(Pachyderm House 2009)

Times are tough and this year’s Christmas, my family is doing a grab bag for adults. Our limit is set at $50 and we are responsible to give some ideas to the gift giver. I have pondered many items. I have my nose set on Anthropology’s Amazing Grace perfume. I’d like some new movies or I could really use some new apparel in my ever shrinking wardrobe. But this is not a ploy for those items. I have found another thing I want and I mean WANT. So this is me begging my secret Santa, pretty please adopt me an Elephant from Riddle’s Elephant and Wild Life Sanctuary.

Last month, while watching Oprah I saw the most amazing show about animals. Part of the show was about a sanctuary in Africa. It was touching to see these hurt elephants rescued and saved at a sanctuary. It was even more unbelievable to learn about an elephant’s personality. They are truly a social creature and love other elephants. Their mourning ritual even made me cry. (Elephants pay homage to the bones of their dead, gently touching the skulls and tusks with their trunks and feet.) And who hasn’t seen that video about the bond formed between a dog and elephant? It’s awesome. If you haven’t scene it, Google Tara & Bella and you’ll find it.

I was just inspired to adopt an elephant. Why hadn’t I thought before now to get myself involved with them? I’m even inspired to learn more about these remarkable creatures. Unfortunately adopting an elephant in Africa leaves me no opportunity to actually visit if the occasion arises. So while researching I found Riddle’s Elephant and Wild Life Sanctuary. They are located in Arkansas and by adopting me an elephant I might actually get the chance to meet them. They also have internship programs, weekend long retreats and an International School for Elephant management. I could actually see myself taking care of elephants. I can’t imagine it’s a huge job demand but I sure would enjoy it. It’s something I’m keeping in mind and one small step in the right direction is adopting an elephant.

So Secret Santa, please adopt me an elephant for $50! How much easier could it be? You don’t even need to leave your home to purchase it for me. And I’ll let you pick which elephant to adopt, it’s too hard for me to pick anyways.

For more information on how you can adopt an elephant or make a one time donation, check out: http://www.elephantsanctuary.org/

To the left is a picture of my son's room...can you see the elephant influence???


Weight Update: I’m down 10.2 lbs since I started. I’ve officially lost the baby weight, now it’s time to continue losing the pre-baby weight. Yahoo!

9/28: 218.4
11/10: 208.2

Read and Send to 10 Friends or You'll Die

(I'm looking at you!)

I’m easily annoyed. Sometimes it’s justified but usually not. This is a short list of things yesterday that raised by blood pressure just slightly, caused my eyes to roll and made me think “Gosh I hate this shit!.” I realize my list incorporates a lot of my friends. I still love you all but know when you do the first two things on my list, I want to put you in a choke hold and yank on your hair.

First things first…chain emails. Please for my sanity please stop sending these. I’ll say right now to everyone…thank you for wanting my money issues to go away. Thank you for wishing me good luck for the next 40 years. But no thank you for wishing me an untimely death if I don’t send this email to 19 friends. Don’t count me as one of your 19 friends! Know that the moment I realize what you sent, I hate you for a tiny second and will until the moment I get it out of my sight. (Ok, hate is a little strong but I’m not changing it) Yesterday I received the same chain email from 3 different co-workers! Really!?! Really!?! Please choose to break the cycle. I do. And I can tell you that I’m not followed around by a black cloud; You’ll live!!! Stop being paranoid and delete that chain email or at least smarten up and stop sending them to me. Now I’ll be fair and say a few emails I do appreciate: LOLCATS, people you find at Wal-Mart, funny video clips or just plain forwarded emails containing something interesting. The moment it states “send this to…” I’m annoyed! So…STOP IT ALREADY!

As for facebook, they have their own version of “chain” emails. If you have ever posted “I have the best son, he is incredible. I want to eat his face. Re-post this if you have a wonderful son.” Then know I just flared my nostrils in aggravation and shot you with lasers from my eyes. I love sentimental posts on facebook. I would like to know you love your son and how he’s affected your life, but if you just repost that shit because someone else’s post told you too, I think you are lame! (I’m so sorry family because a lot of you are guilty of this.) So when you see those posts asking you to repost if you think you have the best husband, wife, mother, family, daughter, dog or whatever, please refrain. Find the uniqueness you have within and put something original about that special person; It’s more heartfelt and sincere and those are two things society could use more of anyways.

I have no idea why but the sight of George Lopez annoys me. It never fails that when I’m ready for bed and channel surfing, his stupid ass talk show is on TV. Sometimes I try and stomach watching him for a few minutes because I notice he has an actual guest I’m interested in, but it never fails, I must change the channel. Not only is he unattractive, his personality irritates me and I think he’s a lousy talk show persona. So if you watch George Lopez, I think you’re crazy! I also have a hard time watching Jay Leno and David Letterman. In fact, I didn’t start watching late night talk shows until Conan came around and what happened, nobody watched and he was booted out. WTF!?! Maybe I’ve got no taste.

What irritates you? Maybe it’s people blogging about what irritates them, or maybe it’s people who overuse LOL…you tell me!

Shell’s “Shameful” Secrets (29 Days & Counting)

Some of my friends would say I have no shame. And I would agree that I’m hard to embarrass but I do believe I have some habits or tendencies that some other people might find embarrassing or shameful. So I figured, why not write them down to share. I was a little inspired by Oprah’s show last week titled “Are You Normal?” It got me thinking…I’m way normal. So why not share some of my shameful secrets. Here goes:

Shameful Secret #1: I am a complete sucker for Amanda Bynes or Hilary Duff movies. That’s right! I see What a Girl Wants or A Cinderella Story on television and you bet your ass that my household chores have just been put on hold. I think I could honestly say I watched Sydney White every other day on my maternity leave, which was 10 weeks long mind you. And unlike other movies I’m so passionate about that I want you to know why I love them, there is absolutely no good reason for these. They aren’t even good high school flicks that I adore so much. (Think Never Been Kissed and Sixteen Candles as top choices in that category.)

Shameful Secret #2: I still like to listen to NSYNC’s Celebrity album. First of all, I think their two best songs are on this album which are “Girlfriend” and “Gone.” But take those songs aside and I still would listen to every single song in it’s entirety with the exception of the one ballad. I do have some pride though; I don’t listen to Backstreet Boys. They are and always will be inferior to NSYNC!

Shameful Secret #3: Now this one is a little embarrassing. Dr. Oz said on Oprah that the average person touches their nose 5 times per hour. And I believe it. Have you ever found yourself picking your nose without thinking about? I have. What do you do with that booger that is now attached to your finger? Well in my last car I wiped them on the underside of my seat and my dear husband got to find that little pile of wonderfulness…he still teases me about it. But seriously, I want to say sometimes a Kleenex just doesn’t cut it like a finger does. I no longer wipe my hand clean on my seat…want to guess wear those boogers go now??? I flick them out the window! Now don’t misquote me, I don’t pick my nose 5 times per hour. And if I have a Kleenex I’ll always try that first but when I feel a clingy crusty, you know I’m going in to get it. Also, I should add…after I blow my nose, I look!

Shameful Secret #4: I compare all young adult shows to my alma mater; Dawson’s Creek. Though watching it now is a little boring because what was racy and controversial then is no longer shocking. Remember Pacey sleeping with his teacher? Remember when Jack came out of the closet? Big news then, not so much now. And I’d also like to credit them with giving young adults vocabulary that was out of this world. I use to think “Who talks like that?” Perhaps Diablo Cody took a few notes from Dawson’s Creek and upped their annity when she wrote the screenplay for Juno. (Yes, I know Juno is awesome, DC is not.) Anywho, I love Dawson’s Creek even though it ain’t kosher.

Shameful Secret #5: I have peed in the shower and I’m sure it will happen again. Sometimes I just don’t feel like I have to pee until I’m in the shower and all wet. So out of laziness of getting out, feeling cold and drying off, I just let it go down the drain. I know for a fact I’m not the only one who’s done this but it’s not my right to “out” anyone here. Since I’m in the realm of bathroom habits, I guess I could also add that I when I do use a toilet I actually sit on toilets. I don’t hoover. I don’t use seat covers or wrap the toilet in paper. I just stick my heiny down and use the bathroom. I ain’t afraid of no ghosts…I mean germs.

That’s it for today on “shameful” secrets. Do I have more? Heck yeah I do. But I got to leave something I can write about at another time. Wanna share any of your “shameful” secrets?

For those who are following my weight loss count down, below are my weigh ins:

9/28: 218.4
10/6: 217.0
10/13: 215.2
10/21: 214.4
10/27: 214.0

Little by little I’m getting there.

Saying Goodbye to a Long-Term Relationship

The time has come to part ways. I have let you become too important in my life. You have made me lazy and have taken up too much of my time. It’s time to say signora to cable! That’s right, me the self proclaimed TV Queen is giving up cable. Now, to be fair this isn’t all my decision. I didn’t wake up and come to the realization that I need to give up cable. My husband and I are feeling more and more pressure about our everyday bills. If either of us were to lose our jobs, we’d be so SCREWED! So in effort to take charge of our debt, we are tightening our belts and getting rid of what is not absolutely needed and that means goodbye cable. You will be missed. (And looks like the smart phones are going too. It was fun while it lasted.)

Now, this is big. Why is it big? I seriously feel like I am involved with cable. When we first got our DVR I felt the freedom to be able to watch any show on any channel at anytime. I went from watching maybe five shows per week to over 20. Plus my husband is a bit of a workaholic so this has given me company while he’s at work and Desmond is in bed. I’m also a sucker for everything. I want Mundo to win Project Runway, Damon to get the girl, Blair and Chuck to reconcile, New Directions to win state, etc. etc. I like crying and laughing while watching tv. I can’t help but imagine myself in the characters shoes; They cry, I cry. It kinda felt like each show gave me a new life experience so to speak. Sad but true.

I do realize I won’t miss every show that I watch. Having a DVR gave me the opportunity to keep watching shows that are really bad but since I have the time, I kept watching. (The Secret Life of American Teenager this comment is aimed at you.) The departure of cable in my home will mean more reading time. I will definitely have time now to fit in The Deathly Hallows before the next movie and I’ll even get to start The Game of Thrones that is sitting on my kitchen table. This also means I’ll make better use of my Netflix subscription. We have lowered our package to the lowest one possible but still get unlimited online viewing. Lately we have been sitting on several movies for months. Now without cable, we’ll watch and return our movies much quicker and with the online option we’ll still get to watch shows; it’ll just be a season or two behind. I can deal with that.

But as a special thank you for giving me joy when I was bored, I’d like to say goodbye to the following tv shows: True Blood, Boardwalk Empire, Desperate Housewives, Brothers & Sisters, Saturday Night Live, Friday Night Lights, Glee, Gossip Girl, America’s Next Top Model, Project Runway, Vampire Diaries, Grey’s Anatomy, Private Practice, American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, Secret Life of an American Teenager, Sesame Street, Tosh.0, The Soup, Oprah, Cougar Town, Last Comic Standing and Hell’s Kitchen. (I’m sure I missed a few, please forgive me.)

What keeps you entertained at home?

43 Days and Counting

Des & I at our local pumpkin farm.

It’s been two weeks since I’ve checked in. I know I said it would be a weekly thing but sometimes life doesn’t give you enough time to write a blog each week. But don’t think that just because I didn’t update, I didn’t weigh in either. Not the case!

The first week was ROUGH! I had what I assume was a sinus infection. I waited so long to go to the doctor that I think it was already on its way to resolving itself but they put me on antibiotics none-the-less and now I’m feeling much, much better. That week I went from having no appetite and hardly eating to eating just for comforts sake. And not only was I sick and not watching what I ate; I was also so miserable that I didn’t get in ANY exercise.

The second week I was just a jerk to myself. I had no reason not to jump on the band wagon but I continued to make poor eating decisions after being sick. But luckily this attitude didn’t last for long and as of this Monday, I am doing great. My eating is under control. I am exercising again and feeling empowered about my decision to take back control. So how did my weigh-ins go?

9/28: 218.4
10/6: 217.0
10/13: 215.2

Not bad for two half-assed weeks! I’m losing an average of 1.65lbs per week which is a little under what I needed to reach my goal before my 10 year reunion but at this pace I’d be down approximately 13.2lbs so I can live with that. Also, there’s plenty of time left. I would imagine with a full week’s effort I could be able to top 1.65lbs week, so there’s just enough hope left of reaching Onederland by my reunion.

Till next week!

Shell goes to Extremes for Relief

Hi Everyone - Just wanted to post a quick update. I've been sick all week. I missed an awesome skating practice this week which is still depressing me but I thought it would be funny if I showed you a Neti Pot. I had heard the good things it can do if you're congested and I can honestly say I had no idea what the heck it was.

If you choose to use a Neti Pot please read the instructions. I kinda skipped right to the doing and I'm no means a doctor so check with them if this is meant for you.

Here's to a healthier week,
Shell

57 Days and Counting

There is exactly 60 days till my 10 year High School Reunion but only 57 days that I can make the most of what I got. My lovely alums have decided to pick Thanksgiving weekend as our reunion date. I don’t mind the timing, I just wish there was more notice. All year I knew this reunion was quickly approaching and thankfully I have been able to shed 21 pounds till now. But I’m still nowhere near where I could have been had I stayed dedicated throughout the year. So I’ve decided I need a bit of a game plan to make the most of my 57 days.

First off, what a crappy day to start; I have one of my worst colds ever right now. Even my eyes are juicy and starting to crust over. I can’t taste food and have a lack of appetite. The lack of appetite isn’t bad but your body needs nutrition so it’s like force feeding myself right now, I hate it! Anyways, my first plan of attack is Wednesday weekly weigh ins, starting today and ending the day before Thanksgiving. This will keep me accountable. I’m also making weekly videos for youtube with Veronica. Sometimes though our schedules don’t work out and a week is missed and I can’t afford to not weigh in one week and play naïve. If you’re interested in our videos (trust me they aren’t anything special) go to youtube and search for Fatgirlslittlecoat.

I’m also going to follow weight watchers during this time. I have been very successful with weight watchers in the past and I know it can help now. Lately I’ve been just watching what I’m eating and it has kept me at status quo which is good to know that I can continue that when I reach my ideal weight but since I’m not at ideal I need to be more strict right now.

Next step, exercise goals. I’m actually ahead of the game here because I’m in a routine already. Right now I am skating twice a week. That’s four hours of fun exercise. It truly is awesome. I get the burn and pain from a workout but actually enjoy it. It’s my newest addiction and an absolute joy to do. But that’s not all. I also have a membership to my local park district that includes workout classes. On average I’ve been catching one Zumba class a week. So my new goal is to up the ante and make two weekend classes each week instead of one. That would bring my exercise total to about six hours per week. Not too shabby!

So here is today’s weigh in…drum roll please….

9/29: 218.4 (I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.)

My goal is to reach Onederland by the reunion. So to get to 199.9 in the next 8 weeks I’ll have to lose an average of 2.3lbs per week. Not unspeakable but definitely a challenge.

My biggest problem I find is that I can’t think outside the box with food. So if you’ve got a great food find or perhaps an amazing recipe, please share it with me. What keeps you thin?

True Blood Season Finale Suckage

**Warning: This contains spoilers for the season three finale of True Blood. You have been warned!**

What the heck happened? I swear last nights episode of True Blood felt completely out of place. My first concern is about Sookie…what did you do to her? Seriously, where did she go? I know I’m a reader of the books and that sways my opinions a lot about characters, but I think that even if you’re just a fan of the show you’ve seen that Sookie is not a mean or spiteful person. Her interactions with Russell felt completely out of character for me. The Sookie I have grown to love would protect herself for sure, but to purposely “torture” Russell by throwing the remains of his loved one down the garbage disposable, is just a step too far out of normal for her; I didn’t like it.

As for the “cliff hangers,” I hated those as well. Did Sam shoot and kill is brother? Does anyone even care!?! Is Tara gone for good? I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one that would think that Tara’s departure would be a good riddance for the show anyways. Where did Sookie go in fairyland and why are these fairies so fraking lame? Am I the only person that cringes when Claudine appears? This fairy crap is just that…crap! Who will win the fight between the Queen and Bill? Again, who cares!?! And speaking of their fight, when did True Blood turn into the Matrix? I hope to never see the start of a fight mid-air ever again. That fight belongs and should stay in the Matrix only. What were you thinking Alan Ball?

I like the idea behind Eric’s choice to incase Russell in concrete so he could lament over the lose of Talbot but this just ensures that Russell is not gone yet. Yes, he’s being tortured for centuries and that is totally something Eric would do, but it leaves it open to Russell coming back and he’ll be madder than heck. I’m hoping and praying he stays put because I’ve had enough of Russell as well.

I was just overall disappointed with last nights episode; Finales usually have a wow factor. I kept waiting and waiting and it never happened. This was shocking to me because this season has been so fast paced, action packed and just truly bizarre from the start, that the finale had to have something special. Instead it felt like too much of a filler episode where they wanted to end certain storylines and set-up new ones. Had this episode been any other episode than the finale it would have been less disappointing.

Now, I hate being negative so let me focus on the few positives of the show. As a reader, I knew the witches were coming and I’m looking forward to seeing them. I like the foreshadowing they showed with that crazy-spooky doll in Hoyt and Jessica’s new place. You can tell something will happen there by the eerie music they played; they wanted you to notice that tore-up looking doll. I adore Lafayette so I’m glad to see them pulling him into witchcraft area. I also love Jesus but I’m predicting that he being a witch and Lafayette’s yet to be revealed history will start to clash.

My favorite moment though was short and sweet last night. Eric finally nailed the coffin shut for Bill and Sookie’s romance by revealing the secrets Bill had been keeping from her. Now, I realize there isn’t much in the show to make me Team Eric, it’s mostly based on the books, but I was internally screaming “YES!” because I can’t stand Bill and this is finally opening up the Eric reign. So I’ll end this here blog a little cryptically…bring on the amnesia!!!


And just because it's funny; here is the "rejected" Rolling Stone cover, lol.

Sprinkles Cupcakes - Food Diary of a Fat Girl

A few weeks ago I was driving home from work and I heard an interview on the radio discussing the grand opening of Sprinkles in downtown Chicago. I don’t remember the owners name but I do remember the way she was describing her Cinnamon Sugar cupcake…I was salivating! The next day, I googled Sprinkles and sent a list of cupcakes to my husband, who works downtown, that if he ever wanted to surprise me, here’s a bunch of cupcakes I would love to try. I almost forgot about this request, until last Friday my dear husband came home with a dozen cupcakes for me for our anniversary. (What a sweetie, huh?!)

So what’s my review??? It’s mixed. The current prices online are $3.25/cupcake or $36/dozen, which is not the current prices, they are a little higher now. So between the high price and the fact that Oprah raved about these cupcakes, my expectations were really high; They did not always meet those expectations.

The first cupcake I bit into was the Cinnamon Sugar. I am normally a vanilla or chocolate fan but I craved for this cupcake ever since I heard about it. The cupcake was light and moist. I enjoyed the actual cake part but the topping was too lightly sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar. It just didn’t have enough. It would have gotten an A+ had it had a bit more. It just ended up tasting a little plain. This is one of the few cupcakes I ate entirely to myself.

The majority of the cupcakes were spilt with my friends and family. One that sticks out was the Chai Latte. I normally would never order this one and I find out that is with good reason. After one bite of my half, I was not willing to finish the rest of the cupcake and neither was my friend. In my personal opinion this cupcake is a total waste of calories and I would be interested to talk to someone who likes it and hear why. It was just gross. First time I ever met a cupcake that I wouldn’t finish.

But things were looking up after that; the Pumpkin, Lemon Coconut, Red Velvet, Strawberry & Vanilla cupcakes were outstanding. I’m not surprised about the liking the Pumpkin. What’s not to love when you mix pumpkin and cream cheese? That’s hard to mess up. I was surprised about the Lemon Coconut though. I don’t like either of those flavors but their cake had just a hint of the lemon flavor and their coconut cream cheese frosting was also subtle. I liked the Red Velvet. This was actually my first time trying Red Velvet and between the moist cake and the cream cheese frosting it was a winner. The Strawberry had a really yummy frosting and I was sad that I had to spilt this one three ways. The vanilla was also enjoyable; their vanilla frosting is very creamy but the only down fall for this one was the sprinkles. I would prefer my cupcakes without and this delish frosting was coated with them.

I basically found that I REALLY liked their cream cheese and vanilla frosting and their vanilla or “spiced” cake. They were highly superior to all their chocolate counterparts. This seems to be a cupcake shop where the flavors aren’t too strong and in your face. This worked well for the vanilla or “spiced” cakes with vanilla or cream cheese frosting, but when I think of chocolate I think melt in your mouth, cocoa explosion and powerful flavor, so when I tasted these chocolate cupcakes it just wasn’t cutting it.

Overall, I think it was a cool experience to try these hyped up cupcakes but I won’t be running to the store to get more.

Love Letter to My Husband

(Then 1998 & Now 2010)

Michael,

It all started with a simple question, “What happened?” I am so very thankful that you hurt your knee 12 years ago. I realize you might have wanted to avoid tearing your muscle and you might have wanted to skip out of knee surgery, but seeing you hobble around on your crutches at bowling gave me the courage to approach my crush and ask “What happened?”

During the many years we were dating, I was anxious to marry you. I remember very clearly around year 7 when I would get upset after every time we went out because I was certain each time the proposal was coming. I remember my friends saying I should give you an ultimatum; I considered it. But would I really want to force you? Would I really leave you because you didn’t propose? Nope. Because even back then, I knew what a catch I had on my hands. I couldn’t willingly give up the one person that gives me comfort on a daily basis, that makes me feel beautiful and loves me for me. I realized that the ring wasn’t as important as you. (For those who might be curious he proposed just shy of our 9 year anniversary.)

Two years ago we got married and that day is the second happiest moment of my life. (First is welcoming Desmond to this world with you.) This past year has really showed me how much you love me. Being a new mom isn’t easy and I know I haven’t been the easiest person to be around now that my stress level and anxiety is triggered with just the smallest agitation. You are the ice that cools my fire.

I can’t imagine finding another man that will willingly dance with me at every wedding, looking like we are suffering from seizures. A man who attempts lyrical dancing during the opening song of Battlestar Galactica, a man who would still love and kiss me if I had no lips, a man who trims my snaggle toes, a man who makes all phone calls because I won’t and a man who makes me feel safe and gives me and Desmond all the loving we need and more.

And I just want to say that after 12 years I’m still madly in lesbians with you.

You’re the peach to my cream,

Mrs. Michelle Pack

Random Ramblings of Connect the Dots

Yesterday I received the rest of my derby gear via UPS. All I can think about is skating. Now that I have the major items, I want the minor items. Like shoelaces, toe guards, carrying case, etc. etc. I’m really obsessed about finding the perfect carrying case for my stuff that it even led me to a new craving…V! No, I’m not talking True Blood V but V as in V for Vendetta, one of my favorite movies. Ok, you might be thinking how I got from thinking derby to V. Well it started off with wanting to decorate my future derby case. I’m such a lover of movies I was thinking of decorating it with favorite movie quotes. One that came to mind was from a very under appreciated movie called Little Nicky. If you haven’t seen it, below is a picture of Little Nicky.

Best two lines from this movie are: “Popeye's chicken is fuckin' awesome!” and “Can I wash my winky in your kitchen sinky?” Little Nicky came out in 2000 and still to this day whenever my husband and I have Popeye’s we have to say out loud and in our best Little Nicky voice how fuckin’ awesome it is. The second quote just makes me laugh. My husband says I’m easily entertained and I can’t really fight him on that charge based on the evidence provided here.

So I Google Little Nicky hoping to find a decent image from the movie with high quality resolution for reproducing purposes and I didn’t find anything. Well, not anything I liked. So it got me thinking…what movie do I love that is also under appreciated that I know I can find images online, as well as find merchandise, the answer…V for Vendetta!

Now where do I begin with V for Vendetta? It is unfathomable to me when I converse with friends about this movie and they say “it was alright.” Alright!?! Alright!?! I don’t understand. I suppose if your one of those people that only like comedies and fluffy movies, then I can understand this isn’t your thing. I can also understand if you’ve read the graphic novel and didn’t like the changes that were made; I’m a stickler too when it comes to books I love that turn into movies. But if you went to this movie and claim you like all genres and haven’t read the graphic novel, what wasn’t too love? As I look and read memorable quotes from this movie on imdb.com I’m so inspired to sit down and commit to watching this 131 minute movie for the twentieth time.

So what is so great about it? I think I should start off with stating how much I enjoy watching movies where society needs to rebuild. It could be in the form of a zombie apocalypse, nuclear warfare or in this case a totalitarian government that forms after world wide chaos. I just enjoy watching movies where the circumstances are so extreme I can’t help but think “Would I survive this?” “Would I stand up for what I thought was right?” Right away, this movie has an edge because I specifically favor this type of film.

But when I jump into the film, I find it clever. I like the imagery that ties to actual historic events. I like the inspiration from books such as 1984. The wit of V in his everyday speech is amazing. I have even watched the movie with subtitles so I could literally read and appreciate each word that was spoken. In my first viewings, some of the dialog got lost to me either due to how fast he talks (cause it can be really fast) or it was because sometimes I got caught up without having lips to watch. V wears a Guy Fawkes mask throughout the film, so his lips never move. I didn’t realize how much I actually stare at lips while listening and how much it helps me understand what is being said.

The best part to me, is the message throughout the film that ideas are bulletproof. I liked that he was just a man in a mask with an idea. You’re able to watch this movie where the hero eventually dies and yet it is not a sad movie. He is successful. He may have died but not before making his idea known and rallying support behind it. I think the message “Ideas are Bulletproof” is great for paying it forward. This movie inspires me that maybe my next idea is the next great revolution! (Ok, that’s a stretch but go with it.)

So that ends the connect the dots…derby gear to Little Nicky to V for Vendetta. In the words of Gus Portokalos from My Big Fat Greek Wedding “There you go!”

Don’t be such a Pessimist

Well I’ve gone and done it. I’ve gone and started the process of becoming a roller derby chick; You are reading the blog of a Skater Tot. How awesome is that? Last Thursday my friend Julie and I drove all the way out to Rockford (about an hour and fifteen minutes from where I live) to meet Killswitch, the recruiter of the Rockford Rage. First thing I’m told as I enter the rink, “You’ve got the perfect roller derby ass.” Sweet! First time I’m thankful for having such a big ass.

This was the first time that Julie and I skated in years; I fell twice. The first one being the more embarrassing of the two because it happened just as Killswitch skated up to tell me how much I improved over the past half hour. Nice way to show my improvement right? Plus I have a jacked-up looking knee with scabs and bruises. My next fall was much later into the evening when Julie skated up to me to talk. I feel backwards this time and landed on the side of my butt and hip. No bruises for this one but it definitely left me sore. I guess the moral of the story for me is…don’t attempt talking while on speed skates. Below is a close-up of my knee.

So, I’m guessing you’re figuring that despite my falls that I had a good time and I’m looking forward to more, so why is this blog entitled “Don’t be such a Pessimist”? I have this annoying habit of looking too far into future and determining whether something will or will not work out without giving it an honest go. Right now, all that is required of me is to show up to practice once a week and work on the long list of required minimum skills in order to practice with the ladies of the Rockford Rage. That alone has me doubting my ability to commit to this. Getting to Rockford by 6:30 means leaving by 5:15 to get there on time and that’s way too early to even think about my husband being home in time, which means I have to pay a babysitter, I have to pay for the gas, I have to pay for admittance into the roller rink and for the skate rentals and that’s only once a week. What happens when it’s twice a week? I’m already feeling bad for leaving my son behind and on top of that I feel like my bills could easily swallow me whole and now I’m committing to something I really want to do but will definitely put a dent in my pocketbook.

All I need is that one small sliver of doubt and suddenly I find several reasons not to peruse an adventure. I look at the required minimum skills and decide that I’ll never get there based on how unsteady I am I skates right now. I don’t look at it as spending a little each week; I think of the sum total and decide it’s too much. My brain thinks not only can I not afford it but I want more kids one day, therefore abort this mission now! It’s like I have to decide today if I want to bout or have a family? That is the extreme measures my mind works. I have the hardest time seeing a way I can do both. I don’t know what practices will be like when I finally make it to the point of practicing with the veterans. I don’t know when I’ll want to start trying for another kid. I don’t need all the money right now but I just start to “rationalize” and give up before seeing anything through. I’ve done it to myself for school and I’m doing it again now for skating.

So, my new mantra is…”One week at a time.” I know right now, this Thursday I have a babysitter, I can afford it and I want to go. So I will. If I get to a point I can’t afford it, I can’t find a babysitter or I want to expand my family then I‘ll stop when the times comes. Very simple mantra but sometimes I need the reminder to think this way. This is something I’m excited about and I know I’ll be upset if I let me talk myself out of it without giving it an honest try.

Goals of a Vanishing Woman

(Desmond and I last month at Navy Pier. He's the muse behind #2.)

This morning I woke up and had a joyous surprise on the scale. I am FINALLY out of the 220’s!!! I’ve been in the low 220’s for the past three weeks and I really thought my running class would have zipped me right out of them but to no avail. Then that magical thing called a period happened and I’m out of the 220’s. Hallelujah! Does that sound funny to you too? For some great unknown reason to humanity I actually drop weight faster when on my period. Unlike many woman who retain water and get bloated, I feel my absolute best during my period and usually the weight lost stays off as long as I continue eating healthy and exercising, which I fully plan on doing.

So, this new found sense of accomplishment makes me want to list some of the things I want to accomplish this year and here they are:

#1 – ROLLER DERBY – Say what!?! Yup, that’s right, wimple dimple me wants to try out for Roller Derby. I saw my first and only bout a couple months ago and thought it looked like an awesome time. Yes, I’m scared of failing, tripping, meeting new people, losing some teeth, getting hurt in general but I think there are more positive than negatives like exercise, making friends and having a good time. Plus, it’s something I can do for me. I miss playing a competitive sport. Now, joining might be an issue, so my actual goal is to contact the recruiter of the Rockford Rage team and find out what would be required. I’ve done a little research and in general practice is required 2 – 3 times per week; Monday thru Friday is a problem for me. But I’m keeping my fingers crossed I’m not the only working mom and that they have some late night practices. So if I can practice and I can afford the monthly dues, then I want to go for it and I expect you all to be there at my first bout…now for the most interesting part…what should my name be???

#2 – TATTOOS – There are two tattoos that I want. So I’m going to set a weight goal for each to keep me motivated and working toward getting those tattoos and a better body. First, I have a butterfly tattoo on my ankle that I hate. I love that it was a sister tattoo but it is fug-ly! I had to learn the unfortunate lesson that a shared stencil for a tattoo does not look the same when done by different tattoo artists. My sisters had one artist, I had another and let it be said I got the shitty artist. Needless to say, I want a cover-up tattoo. I have a necklace of the Tree of Life and when I looked it up, not only did I find the symbolism of the tree beautiful but the figure as well. So, when I reach Onderland (that’s out of the 200’s), I’m going to get my Tree of Life tattoo over my butterfly. My other tattoo is still a work in progress; I know I want Desmond’s name but not sure with what or where, but I want it bad. So I’m making this the harder one to reach. When I reach 180, I’m allowed to get it. 180 may seem like a lot to you still but I haven’t been 180 since high school; In fact I graduated at around 190, so I’m excited to see how I’ll look at 180.

#3 – PICTURES - I want to document being thin or I should say in shape. There’s this awesome photography studio that does Boudoir & Pin-up girl photos that my friend sent me. Not only will my husband appreciate the photos but I will too. I don’t want anything I couldn’t show my close friends and family, which means all my bits will be covered, so when I’m old and wrinkly I’m going to show my kids and grandkids and say “Hey buckaroos, wasn’t Grandma beautiful?” Hahaha, buckaroos! But seriously, just like Samantha did on Sex and the City, I want to show that “Yeah, that was me. I looked great didn’t I?” I want to look back and see pictures that show I feel beautiful and sexy. Granted it doesn’t take boudoir photos to do it, but it’s something I want to do. I can’t set a weight limit for this one, it’ll be when I feel comfortable enough to take photos half nude.

Well, that’s it for now. I’m super excited that I’m only 18.5 pounds away from getting my cover-up tattoo and I think I’ll be sending that email to the recruiter when my running class ends on August 3rd. If I can’t fill up my time doing some roller skating, then I think I’ll continue running. I’m beginning to like it more and more and I’m hurting less and less from it.

What else can this vanishing woman look forward too as a skinny broad?

In Grimace's Shoes

Ok, I admit this picture of Grimace is pretty happy and the subject matter within this blog entry is not whimsical so don’t be misled by the happy smiley face above.

Yesterday, I notice a certain post on facebook:

“Pro Tip: Large woman wearing purple don’t like being told “Pick a side of the sidewalk Grimace.”

I might not have written this verbatim because it was removed from facebook but it captures the essence of the post. At first read through I thought it was funny and a split second later I was upset and mad. It’s one thing to poke fun of someone’s size if you’re provoked and are verbally sparing with that person, but this large woman in purple with a staggering step just happens to cross the wrong person’s path. What did she do to be suddenly referred to as Grimace? Nothing. My biggest hope is that she did know that Grimace is the large purple monster from McD’s cast of characters; I’m hoping she just knew she was being called something negative and moves on with her day. Cause if she’s anything like me, it can still be hurtful years from now.

What am I talking about??? A few years ago (at least 2 years or more) I was shopping at Woodfield with my friend. I was approached by one of those people who take surveys in the mall. I ended up telling the kid I didn’t have time to take his survey. He then proceeded to tell me rudely that I needed to go to Jenny Craig. Really!?! Like I don’t know I have weight issues? Like I need some punk teenager to tell me I needed to lose weight? WTF? It ruined my whole night. I acted as if I wasn’t pissed and kept shopping but really I was crushed on the inside that somebody I don’t even know, somebody I don’t even care to know, could make me feel so low about myself.

And that’s why this comment pissed me off. I didn’t deserve to be insulted about my weight just because I didn’t have time to take that kids survey. That woman didn’t deserve to be described as the big fat Grimace from McD’s because she was in the way of someone in a rush. We were both in a situation where we were used as vents for a stranger’s frustrations.

Ode to Twilight

This was going to be a movie review for Eclipse but I realized I could sum up my opinion in a few short sentences. It was awesome. It captured the essence of the book. It was the best movie yet out of the Twilight Saga. Previously, New Moon really set a standard for me and Eclipse not only met that standard but also raised it. It wasn’t hard for New Moon to be great because Twilight was so god awful. I’d even be excited to see Twilight again if they ever decided to reshoot it with a new director and rewrote some of the script. I even think the acting skills are getting better on these kids or perhaps I’m just so use to their bad acting, it doesn’t affect me anymore but either way, they just keep getting better.

Now to the purpose of this here blog entry…why is Twilight so wonderful? Let me start first by saying how much it irritates me when I read that Stephenie Meyer has no writing ability. Say what?!? This woman did not sell millions of books because she sucked at writing. She sold millions of books because she successfully captured the magnificence of your first love. She succeeded in writing a classic love story for young adults and as we all know for many adult women. (Twimom here, hello!) She even went as far as creating her own vampire mythology and though the idea of sparkling vampires is quite funny, I enjoyed reading the changes to the stereotypical vampire.

So what does Twilight mean to me? Well, do you remember your first crush? Do you remember when they walked into the room you’d hold your breath? Do you remember when they approached you, you’d get butterflies in your stomach? Do you remember when walking side by side with them and your hands accidently brushed together? Do you remember going to a movie and hoping and praying they would just grab your hand? Do you remember the stress and nerves you felt when you couldn’t decide if that first kiss was coming? That is how Twilight makes me feel and I think it makes lots of women feel this way. It puts a flutter in your stomach. It makes your heart beat with anticipation. It makes you feel like your falling in love for the first time.

Part of the reason Twilight was an epic fail was because the director overlooked the simplicity and awesomeness of a touch. In the book, I remember quite clearly the way Edward would trace his cold hand along Bella’s warm check. How he’d drag is nose along her neck ingesting her scent. All those sensations were new to Bella, so therefore were new to me, making me get all giddy and gaga inside. It took me back to a time when I was sitting on a couch next to my crush (and current husband mind you) and he put his arm across my shoulders and he lightly traced his fingers back and forth on my arm. It was and is still one of the most amazing feelings I’ve ever felt. So why wouldn’t I want to read a book that causes me to get a similar feeling in my tummy? No reason, hence the main reason why I’ve read Twilight and the rest more than once.

I know for most women, watching the movies and reading the books is as far as their obsession goes. And that’s ok. In fact, that’s normal. I don’t claim to be normal. After reading Breaking Dawn, I felt a little jipped after their first night on their honeymoon. I do realize this is a young adult story but the fade to black that happened just as they were about to get busy did not meet my expectations. I spent four books dying for these two to seal the deal and what do you get??? Fade to black! I remember reading stories in grade school that had racier things in them then this book did. Total fail Stephenie…total fail. To ease my disappointed heart, my dear best friend knew of this fairytale world called fanfiction and sent me a link of an authors version of the missing scenes; I was instantly hooked. Not only did I get the fix I needed but I was able to enjoy these characters that much longer. The addiction is so strong that even though Breaking Dawn was released in August 2008, I’m still reading fanfiction…that almost 2 years later. I think that this speaks volumes on how much Stephenie Meyer makes you care about her characters and it also says that I’m loyal and a wee bit crazy in the head.

Another huge selling point on the Twilight Saga is that almost every woman you know has read it. If they haven’t, please lend them your books. I get so much joy spreading my love for Twilight to others. I enjoy spotting a stranger holding the book and starting a conversation with them about it. I love having my friends over for a party whenever the movies are released on DVD. It makes for good conversation and gives women something to bond over. It has also awakened my reading habit and made some of my friends enjoy reading for the first time. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Why do you love the Twilight Saga? (And if you want some great fanfic recommendations, I’ve got plenty.)

Just Call me Randy

Some people might find this topic disturbing; so if you get queasy at the idea of me having sex, if the words wet or throbbing disturbs you, if you easily get embarrassed when saying the words penis or vagina, if reading this few lines are making you blush, then let me suggest this…stop reading now!

Ok, I hope that got rid of most of my family. For some reason I’m in the mood for talking about something saucy and by saucy I mean movies that make me randy…yeah baby!

I tried googling “Sexiest Movies of All Time” in hopes to find movies to add to my short list of baby making movies, but I honestly had not seen a lot of them or I did not find them sexy. For instance, Basic Instinct was on many lists. I just recently saw this movie for the first time and I was kinda looking forward to watching and waiting for my husband to come home, but unfortunately my husband could not reap the benefits of his wife getting hot and bothered over a movie. Basic Instinct was a total fail in the sexy department. First, I did not care for any of the acting. It seriously felt like a very short step up from a porno. I know for a fact I’ve seen Michael Douglas and Sharon Stone having decent acting skills but they locked those skills up tight while making this film. Also, the nature of sexy times did not appeal to me as a woman. I suppose if I was a man, the “hardcore” sex scenes might have given me a stiffy but I’m not a man. This movie blowed!

Well, 2002 was a good year for sexy movies because my top 2 sexiest movies of all time were released that year. So let’s begin with my #2….Unfaithful.

Unfaithful (2002) - New York suburban couple's marriage goes dangerously awry when the wife indulges in an adulterous fling.

I can still clearly recall the weekend my husband and I watched this movie. Though I was HIGHLY disturbed by this movies ending it still left me with a GIANT itch that my husband had to scratch. (My vagina had a week’s recovery time, sorry for TMI.) It was well acted. The sex scenes were extremely believable. I never felt like I was waiting to hear that stereotypical music “bow chica wow wow” and though I don’t find adultery sexy, I do find the “forbidden” sexy. I read a boat load of vampire romance books. Why? Because I like the forbiddeness of the immortal vampire after the mortal human. Even the bible has the story of Adam & Eve and eating the forbidden apple. It’s a highly appealing aspect and this movie is full of it. I would recommend watching this movie with a loved one or heck with yourself; self love is totally cool. I will forewarn you that the biggest turn off of this movie is the ending, it’s not happy but you’ll still be ready for some action regardless.

And now for my #1 Sexiest Movie of all Time…Secretary.

Secretary (2002) - A young woman, recently released from a mental hospital, gets a job as a secretary to a demanding lawyer, where their employer-employee relationship turns into a sexual, sadomasochistic one.

Ok, Ok…I realize from the short synopsis above this movie does not sound sexy. In fact it sounds crazy. Heck I even realize that the actors, James Spader & Maggie Gyllenhael, aren’t even that great looking. Some of you may even be repulsed or confused by the word sadomasochistic. But none of those even come close to factoring in the sexiness that this movie has. I am, in no way shape or form, into sadomasochism and you don’t need to be to find this movie sexy or relatable. While watching I easily related to Maggie’s character throughout the film as she’s left wanting for more from James Spader. As her desire builds and builds throughout the film, I also felt my own growing desire. The most surprising thing for me was I watched it for the first time on basic television, so all nudity was cut out and things were shortened, but I was still getting incredibly turned on. Also, the movie ends on a happy note which easily places this movie in my #1 slot over Unfaithful. Though highly unconventional, this is an epic love story that is well acted, well written and might make you feel dirty while watching but at the same time makes you excited and bedroom ready.

What movie makes your apex ache or makes your pork sword salute? I’m always looking for something new. (Don’t get me wrong, I don’t always need a movie to put me in the mood.)

A Word to the Unwise

This weekend I was a little stressed out. My son is turning one and on Friday morning I find out the photographers scheduled his photo shoot for Saturday morning when I had a confirmation they were a month later. Though it doesn’t seem like a big deal, I had big plans for nice outfits for me, my husband and child. So I took a half day off work to find said items in one night of shopping. I was really proud of myself and how much I got done before Saturday mornings photo shoot.

As I got ready Saturday, I’m wearing my new outfit. I’ve put on my new make-up and I’m feeling great about how I’m looking. So as my husband is driving us to our appointment I notice he keeps looking at me. I think it’s because of my make-up; it’s a little different than what I normally wear but it’s a subtle change. I begin to doubt my new confidence I have from the outfit and make-up. So I’m looking for a quick pick me up. I ask…”How do I look honey?”

Granted, what my husband responded with wasn’t bad, but a word to the unwise…when your wife asks “How do I look honey” please don’t say “Fine.” Fine feels like it’s just above acceptable. Fine feels like “it’ll do.” Fine feels indifferent. If a woman is asking how she looks she is NEVER waiting to hear the word “fine.” I can guarantee it. Now if that woman is insecure about her weight, on her way to a photo shoot capturing said weight and you’re driving in the car to that appointment so there’s no chance of changing what she’s wearing, it very safe to say “fine” is not going to work. And it’s also safe to assume she’s going to be a little snappy.

I know, I know…I’m being a little sensitive and crazy. I’ll be the first to admit it but if this small warning can help any couple from having a stressful car conversation on what “fine” does and does not imply, then I have succeeded. So gentlemen, never say your lady friend looks fine, it just doesn’t cut it. Imagine how different this would have felt if he had said “Great.” That one little word changes the tone completely. Makes for a happy wife and pleasant car ride.

Good luck Gentlemen…us woman are complex creatures.

Finding Me – Career Life

I can’t remember the exact date but I remember a certain conversation I had with my mother. We were simply in the car and she says “Michelle, what do you want to do with your life? Cause you aren’t doing what you’re suppose to be doing. You were meant for more.” How is it that at 28 years old, I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up?

I considered Mortuary school for awhile, but if I’m honest with myself, I’m not quite comfortable comforting strangers who have lost a loved one. I’m also not comfortable with the selling aspect at a funeral home. I would literally want to be in all behind the scenes area of this field. Is that realistic? I’m not sure. Plus this requires full-time days for school and after school clinicals, so I would have no time for my family; Not a big fan of that.

Another career I considered was the Army. I remember a recruiter coming in and talking to my eighth grade class about her life with the Army and thought “I wanna do that.” It also gave me a new outlook on the army. I can’t help but see a solider in uniform and I get teary eyed; They may be strangers but I’m proud of them and I’m literally thankful for their service to our country. But here I am at an undesirable age and overweight. I once went to a recruiter and even went as far as testing to join the reserves but part of the reason I didn’t step forward was because I couldn’t decided on my MO. And now, I’m at an age that if I got in shape do I really want to join? I have a family and army life is so strict. They say jump, you say how high. I couldn’t imagine asking Michael or Desmond to move around or fear me heading to war.

What I want is not something that can be taught. I want to own a campground. I want my own movie theater. (Like the Cat Low in Barrington, Google it. They are great.) I’d even love to have a riverside marina where boaters can dock and have fresh food and drinks before scampering off on the rest of their afternoons. I would love to own a book store. But does one start something like this? I’m certainly not interested in getting a business degree but can’t see how I would understand running my own business without it. I certainly don’t have savings to start my own business. I don’t even have big enough balls to actually start my own business.

I feel like I should have a career counselor like I use to have in high school. It didn’t help me then but perhaps it could help me now. Maybe there’s more out there that I’m not aware off. I guess I just feel scared; scared to fail, scared of trying something new, scared to commit, scared of financial doom…the list goes on and on. I suppose I’m looking for something that sounds so worthwhile that I’ll be up for the risk. And I wish it could be as easy as decidng to start a family because so far that is the best decision I've made since growing up. Now if only if I could figure out my career path…

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Seasons 52 - Food Diary of a Fat Girl

For the past five months, I’ve been trying to be conscious of the food I’m eating. It’s not long from now that Desmond with turn one and I’m still lugging around 13 pounds of fat from my pregnancy. (Not to mention the additional fat that was there before getting pregnant.) It’s hard to be good when I love food so much. I use food when I’m bored, when I celebrate and when I’m depressed or sad. But one thing that will make going out a little easier on my waistline is a new restaurant in Schaumburg that just opened up, it’s called Seasons 52.

I went to Seasons 52 last night with nine co-workers to celebrate office birthdays. The menu changes each season and each week are new specials, so the menu always has the freshest in-season foods possible. We picked the place because we read that all items on the menu are guaranteed to have 475 calories or less. What a great concept! Our society today is getting so fat I don’t know why there aren’t more restaurants doing this. On their website you can find all their menu items with full nutritional information. So I knew last night exactly how many calories, fat and fiber I had, which was perfect for somebody like me who is doing Weight Watchers.

Now for the best part, the food review. I was knocked out! Not only did everyone’s dishes look delicious but it WAS delicious. I had the soup special, Steak & Onion. The steak was so tender, melt in your mouth good. My friend and I shared the Garlic Chicken Flatbread which was another awesome choice. This dish is originally an appetizer but it was large enough to share as an entrée when paired with the soup. I was definitely satisfied with these two dishes. Other dishes that were ordered were; Shrimp & Crab Stuffed Mushrooms, Spicy Tuna Roll, and Shrimp Penne Pasta. I didn’t hear one complaint from my fellow co-workers.

And the best part of the food…dessert. They have this dessert presentation where they bring fresh dessert right to your table and you get to see what each one looked like. My mouth was watering. Each dessert is in a small glass appropriately the size of two large shot glasses. I chose the Caramel Mocha Macchiato, which reminded me of a tiramisu; I would definitely get again. I tried my co-workers Chocolate & Peanut Butter Mousse and it was amazing. (My only complaint was the brownie bottom was bland but the actual mousse part was awesome.) I didn’t get to try my other co-workers desserts but they had the Rocky Road, Baklava, Mango Cheesecake, Key Lime Pie and Pecan Pie desserts. They seriously all looked fabulous. Can you tell I’m a sucker for sweets?

I had a total of 688.5 calories, 26.5g fat and 3g of fiber or in Weight Watcher world better known as 15 points. Not bad for soup, pizza and dessert!!!

So check out Seasons 52. Even if you’re not watching what you eat, I can tell you that if nobody told me the food was 475 calories or less I wouldn’t have been able to tell because it still tastes sinful.

Seasons 52
1770 East Higgins Road
Schaumburg, IL 60173
www.seasons52.com

American Idol - And the Winner is...

…LEE DEWYZE!!! But unfortunately, I’m not 100% sure. Last week I single handily predicted Lee to be the winner. He had no competition last week. He would easily have been called the champion BUT Crystal seriously pulled out the big guns and Lee went down in burning flames last night. So why do I still think he’ll win? First, I’m loyal to the core. I believe most people are loyal to the things they love. Lots of people love Lee and I’m thinking they still love him after his major smack down last night. Secondly, Lee is more lovable. He’s nervous, he seems overwhelmed and amazed at what is happening in his life and he’s really making the process of making something out of nothing relatable to the everyday person like myself.

It’s not that I don’t like Crystal. She became my favorite after Didi got the boot. But I didn’t see any growth, I didn’t see anything new from her and I just grew bored. As that happened, Lee started to come out of the dark corner he was hidden in and I was suddenly on the Lee Dewyze bandwagon. (I’m still a Didi fan. She got it dirty on the show.) I will give it to Crystal, last night she was amazing and I think she has great things ahead of her. She did exactly what she needed to do to be in the top spot and it could go either way really but she just lacks something to me and what she lacks, Lee has.

So I’m sticking with my original pick. Lee for the win!

What was your favorite moment this year on Idol? Mine was the Lee and Crystal duet. I hope we get a repeat performance on tonight’s results show.

LOST Series Finale - Goodbye Brotha!

Well it’s over…and I’m not sure how I feel about it. I didn’t dislike the finale but I didn’t love it either. For me, this last season still left me with a lot of questions. (Big surprise right?) I imagined the finale having more details. The creators/writers gave you the most basic explanations or they HEAVILY skimped you on the details. But at the same time I can see why they did. How do you explain the physics of an island that has a bright light center that can turn people into smoke monsters, time travels and relocate itself? And it’s hard for me to accept that the Losties have a special place where they all meet in the afterlife befor proceeding on to heaven or whatever is next for them. I crave more information. This is where Locke would tell me I’m a woman of science not of faith. Seriously, I’m deranged to even think I’d get more answers.

One question though that derived directly from the finale episode is…why didn’t Ben go into the Church?

Bang Bang I Shot You Down

Way to go Grey’s Anatomy…that was one hell of a season finale!!!

Overall this season was weak. The only reason I was still watching Grey’s was for Christina and Owen. Then the writers started making it look like their relationship was crumbling and I considered flouncing.

But between last weeks show and yesterday’s season finale, I know I’ll be returning to watch next season. (There will be another season right?) Just to briefly touch on last week, I was bawling when Dr. Sloan handed over his grandson to the adoptive parents. It was so hard to watch him do that when you know how much he loved his grandson and wanted to raise him but not having it be his choice. Then his little one on one chat with his daughter afterwards officially pegged him The Man of the show. What happened to Dr. Shepherd anyways? Seriously, when did he lose his sex appeal? Cause it’s disappeared and I’m not even interested in looking for it. I would be negligent if I didn’t mention quickly that Dr. Avery is another steamy dish on the show, just saying.

****Spoilers Alert below for those who haven’t watched yet****

Ok, now for last night…were you not tense the entire two hours??? I couldn’t believe how many main characters got shot. I hate when you see a promo making it look like its going to be a crazy dramatic night and then nothing really happens. Well lots of shit happened last night. BANG! Reid is shot in the forehead. BANG! Alex is shot in the chest. BANG, BANG, BANG as random hospital employees are shot down. The shooter seriously resembles Michael Myers as he slowly roams the hallways killing people, and the scariest thing of all, this shit could happen!

One of my “favorite” tense moments was the scene with Mandy Moore’s character, Dr. Bailey and that other guy. (I’m so sorry other guy, your death did make me cry but I don’t remember your name.) As you hear the shooter ask the other guy “Are you a surgeon?” I’m thinking say no fool, say no! But the other guy says yes and BANG he’s shot in the stomach. And of course, like a good show does, he falls down and is looking at Dr. Bailey hiding under the bed safely while he bleeds out. But all is not safe, Dr. Bailey is dragged out from under the bed like any good scary movie does and is asked “Are you a surgeon?” Right there, the conflict in her eyes should win her an award. The smart lady lies and says “no” and lives and this whole time Mandy Moore is pretending to be dead in the hospital bed. Totally cliché but totally fraking brilliant.

Another “favorite” scene is when Meredith watches the shooter pointing a gun at her husband. The moment the trigger is pulled and the camera shows Christina holding Meredith back as she starts screaming is so well done. Ellen Pompeo’s acting is so believable. Your heart is breaking just by the look on her face and then you start thinking “Not her baby daddy! Not him!” Bravo writers, Brav-o!

Now off to my last “favorite” scene. (Or the last I’ll mention cause there are a TON more.) Owen walks into the O.R. and there sits Meredith waiting patiently as her best friend operates on her husband behind her. Right away you can tell something is up just by looking at Owen’s face. And I’m thinking Derek is dead or dying but as the camera follows Owen into the next room you see the shooter with a gun to Christina’s head, demanding she stop operating on Derek. Say what!?! I guess I should have expected something this crazy to happen but I really didn’t expect to find the shooter there. Again, he was definitely as sneaky as Michael Myers.

It appears that all is going to be well for Derek and Alex. Meredith will eventually have to tell Derek about their miscarriage. I have a feeling that the old Meredith will be back. You know, the doom and gloomy Meredith that made past seasons very hard for me to watch. I also predict that while Derek recovers the old chief will be reinstated; I can just see the power struggle later for Derek to get his old position back.

I guess my main favorite thing about the show was how well the actors/actresses showed emotions on their faces. Words weren’t needed. So as an audience member I was able to feel their fright. On top of that, rouge shooters is unfortunately something society now deals with and I think everyone can imagine the horror if they were ever caught in this situation. Regardless of this show’s dark theme, it was well done, well acted and definitely made me glad to have stayed on the Grey’s Anatomy bandwagon.